If you've ever been in a situation where you thought you were about to seal the deal, only to have the other person change their mind at the last minute, you're not alone. This is a common scenario.

It's like you're in a video game, right? You've battled your way to the final boss, and just when you think you've won, she pulls out her trap card... the Last Minute Resistance.

I found this movie scene quite relevant in that regard.

For context, Ethan Hawke met this French girl on a train going to many European destinations and started chatting with her. They started vibing. He then had to stop in Vienna, Austria. Just before he left, he convinced the French Girl to spend the day with him visiting the city. After questioning herself, she decided to let spontaneity win the day.

Throughout the day, they go on a bit of adventure, but as they are both broke, they do not have any money to pay for a hotel, so like two bums, they end up lying in the park at night. One key fact to remember is that they made the promise never to see each other again in order to properly live the moment without worries about the future. There is obviously an attraction between them, and this is where the natural escalation starts.

Introduction => He starts to sweet-talk her, but he is playing conservatively on the physical escalation side and would instead focus on some deep chat. Until she calls a spade a spade, French Direct Style: "Fucking." Both of them have that in mind, and the tension is increasing. She then explicitly tells Ethan Hawke she wants to be kissed because he is still playing it too safe, despite him laughing it off. Now, he has the green light to proceed. So far, so good.

The Disturbing Element => Evidently, things cannot flow naturally when a woman is involved. So, despite the French Girl having explicitly entertained the idea of fucking Ethan Hawke, she now has second thoughts. Surprise... Understand this: a woman's mind is chaotic; many contradictory thoughts are operating simultaneously in her mental RAM. Thankfully, she is conscious of the stupidity of what she is about to say:

"I don't think we should sleep together; I mean, I want to, since we are never going to see each other again, it will make me feel bad (obviously no thought for Ethan Hawke's blue balls, but that is another subject), I want to know who else you are with, I am going to miss you. I know this is not very adult (no shit); it is a female thing; I can't help it (appreciate the honesty)."

Womanese translation: I really feel you can hurt me if I open myself more (figuratively and literally) - women will translate that as they care for a guy, when it is more the fact that they care for themselves. They want to be in control, and PUAs will tell you it is about unlocking the code of the secret society of the guys who fuck; she must make sure you are part of it for you to fuck her. Although there is some truth to it, in this context, it is more about her not wanting to render this spontaneous and meaningful meet-up into a random shag (so much for outcome independence of the original premise of not seeing each other again ever...) Props to French girls, in general, for being honest about what is going on in women's minds and how it is.

Explanations of why other girls do this in other contexts are the following:

=> She does not want to feel like a slag

=> She wants to know you are not a thirsty mofo

=> She wants to feel "it just happened" for etiquette; she let go of herself when she was not supposed to (it makes it more accurate in her head from a narrative standpoint, although cutting the flow of getting freaky in the NPC fashion most of them do prove anything but)

Going back to the original context of the video, to address the rationale behind the Last Minute Resistance, it is about NOT arguing with her about it but accepting what she says and pulling back as a matter of respect (...of her nonsense), at least at first.

Incident #1 => She confirms she does not want to be the slutty French Girl (American Cliché, which holds accurate as French Women are less hypocritical about their promiscuity than other nationalities) who the guy banged, and her being part of a locker room story. Unfortunately, Ethan Hawke, being the horny noob he is supposed to represent in this role, decides to go on the logical sphere, saying that "Of course, I don't JUST want to get laid; I think we should". Negotiations with women are not overt; they are covert. Don't focus on the words; focus on the vibe, which he did not do. Unsurprisingly, she denies him. When a girl brings you an objection, don't frontally address it; she will do what she does best, which is to DOUBLE DOWN, and it is harder to come back from.

Incident #2 => "It is ok, we don't have to have sex, it is not a big deal". Ethan Hawke manages here to catch the ball he almost dropped by acknowledging where the French Girl was coming from, to which she says, "OK" Here, she is frustrated because he did not give her complete validation of why she should not fuck him, so she is not 100% sure whether she will give them the guts to him or not.

Incident #3 => That is why she throws an olive branch, asking him if he does not want to see her again. He is all excited, feeling like he has an opening again (no pun intended). He has the excellent idea to address her feelings this time, giving one good line of BS (girls ask to be lied to, don't feel bad, indulge them, regardless, you will be blamed no matter what). Also, one trick to keep in mind is if you know something you are about to say is BS, make sure to communicate that you know it can be heard as BS as a way to alleviate the concerns behind the gaslighting itself and make sure you sound like you genuinely believe in it. Whether the girl will buy it depends on how much she wants the outcome she claims she is fighting against (bad faith, where are you?).

Don't feel guilty for not being genuine; you are just playing to their level.

Resolution => The French Girl is giving the green light: "Actually, I decided I wanted to sleep with you when we got off the train, but now that we have talked so much, I don't anymore". Really, there is not much Womanese in this; she is as clear as water behind her rationale. A woman will know if she wants to fuck you pretty fast, within a few seconds. The game is about not stepping on your own dick. Generally, guys do that by speaking too much. In the end, there is a low level of trolling from the French Girl with "Why do I have to make things so complicated?" before giving herself away for some midnight double monkey backflips in the park.

Conclusion => Don't change her mind; change her mood. It is not about what makes sense but what feels right in a girl's mind.

How to Pass LMR?

Pull Back, acknowledging what she says. Act as if it is a nothing burger and continue the interaction as you left it before she gave you that LMR. Make a move again a bit later, acting as if what she said previously did not matter. You can see here that it was not a real NO. With experience, you will know when it is a No and a Yes, or a No-No. Give it two go (the first one being the original decline).

On another note, women are more likely to change their minds when you agree with them, especially when the disagreement has to do with something to your detriment. Call it their contrarian mind. In the scene, focus on the face she does when he agrees with her when they should not have sex. You could tell she was happy not happy.

But really, what is last-minute resistance? It is her negotiating the sex by making you jump through her shit tests for you to get the cookie. If you have to go through the BS, it is because the frame you set was not convincing enough, and she was more in control of the dynamic than you were. She was leading, and you were following. You could easily see this in the scene. This is not an ideal situation. Her sex is the reward here, not yours thus you have to flip the script.

I will widen the subject as to why shit-tests like LMR are not positive; even though you get the sex, you operate entirely in her frame. Even if you pass the shit test, she still is the judge, and you are the jester. In both situations, she is toying with you. Once you understand that, you have two choices:

1) Drop her after the bang because she did not respect you enough that her fears of how everything would be perceived took precedence over being present in the moment and, more importantly, disappointing you. She gave you negotiated sex whether you like to admit it to yourself or not. It sets a bad precedent if you want to push the interaction to something like a relationship.

2) Just leave after she pulls that trick by taking what she says at Face Value, because at the end of the day if she did that, it was because she operated the subconscious arbitrage that there would be more chance you stick around despite a rebuttal than her losing you. Otherwise, she would put those ten toes up straight up.

She decided you were a follower rather than a leader.

Sex will cloud the judgment of most guys, thinking it is a win. If you are still at the stage of building your notch count as a way to bring your "Self-Esteem" up, fair enough. But don't be surprised if things peter out soon after the bang, because your whole behaviour was just a dependent variable on you getting the poon.

I will spare you the fact that all of her back-and-forth shenanigans are contrived as they can get to someone with experience.

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